Tim turns 30 (part 2)

Well, it happened.... and Tim loves it and I feel pretty good about it. Yes, he did it, he moved out! I believe our gracious Heavenly Father opened the right doors as he did not move down the street where I could see his apartment but I see God's hand in this farther away place.
   So yesterday as I was picking Tim up for an outing with us, he appeared from the apartment complex with his dirty laundry! He said he did not want to use his quarters and so he wanted to come visit after our outing and do his laundry like he learned from his sister when she lived away at college. I smiled.
   I helped Tim make some invites as he is having an open house/house warming this coming Saturday and he is very excited to show his friends his new place.
      I  feel emotions that flow both directions as I want to warn him about people who would take advantage of him and I want him to make new friends and be neighborly.
       So at age 30 Tim has reached another goal. Wasn't it just yesterday that our goal was to walk and talk? I am so proud of him.... it brings tears to my eyes and joy in my heart.
   So what is our next goal? Well, right now it is to get......
No, right now it is to enjoy the moment! I am helping my son with his own open house. :-)

I think I will give him a roll of quarters for his house warming gift!

socialization

socialization..... oh, how I hurt when I hear that word! And I saw it again this past summer at a park in Santa Cruz. 
    There I was with my dear grandchildren and not thinking about the separate world I live in with my other son Tim.... until I saw him... a young man playing basketball all by himself and I knew as I watched him that he had Down syndrome. I thought about just walking by as I had on my hat of "Nana" and not my "advocate for people with Down syndrome" hat... But I bet you can guess what I did?
      I went up to the man with the young man and introduced myself and talked with him thinking he was the father. "Oh, no, he corrected. I am just a friend/mentor."  As I walked away I was reminded how much it takes to be a parent, the sacrifice, the ownership, the hard-work and so much more. The man cared, yes, I think to a degree, but not like a parent.
     So I wanted to thank each of you that reads this and is a parent. Thank you for giving of yourself, your dreams and so much more to be all you can be your your child. 
  God bless you,
       Humbly yours,
                  Sue

They want to use their wings!!!!

yes, my guys want to use their wings... yes, I know that was my goal to help them develop wings to fly.... but I thought the small studio apartments would be their flying... but no, they both "really" want to do a solo flight... yes, without ME! and without each other!!! I am shocked and yet is not this what I have worked for????  Below is my heart felt letter I sent out to have people praying as we move ahead with their "30 year old goals".. more to come!

Hello dear friends and family,

              Writing to ask you to join us in prayer as we enter another adventure in our lives.  Tim, who most of you have known since his birth, is turning 30 this year. Where have the years gone?!  But you all know there have been struggles and triumphs that have brought tears to our eyes and joy to our hearts and Tim has taught us so much.  We know we would not be the Christians we are if God had not given him to us. 

              So here is the next step: Tim wants to move out.  He has been talking about not really being content here for some time now.  We thought this was the “perfect” home for him and yet after 5 years of training and supervision he wants his own one bedroom apartment.  Tears are filling my eyes as I write this as it again brings both emotions: happy and successful that Tim is being like all adult children and wanting his complete independence and hasn’t this been our goals for decades?  So as he spreads his wings and flies away I have a heart struggle. I want him to be safe and protected and I hear God speaking in my ear, “I will be his God.” 

              Will he make it? Isn’t it too expensive for his budget? Where? When? Kevin wants the same thing and Buck and I cannot talk them into getting an apartment together.  So we support them and help them and leave the door open to come back.  We want Tim to be content and maybe he will fly away for a time and come back or he will go and God will show Himself stronger than I have faith for right now.  The first step is his meeting today with a regional center worker where he will tell her his desire and see where that leads.

              So, I have no answers just tears are flowing and I need you all to be praying with us and for us.  This is a good thing and the right move and at least he is looking at downtown Sonora and not far away.   We want to give a big thank you to each of you who have walked beside us over the three decades of his life; we could not have raised him without you.

Grateful that we can have you join us in the next adventure,

Sue & Buck

Ps please do not call with questions…. I have no answers…. But God will guide us, of that we are sure!  J

Tim turns 30 (part one)

  

It is 2012.... How did that happen?!?!   Do you know what that means?   My "baby", turns 30 in just a couple of months......    

Now that is big in our family as each child’s 20^th birthday was a big one and then the 25^th and then the next big one is 30.  So what do we do to celebrate this year?  And even more important what is the next big adventure for Tim?

Timothy looked forward to age 25 as we told him when he turned 20 that the next big adventure was moving out at 25…. Then it came and I was sure he wasn’t ready any more than I was. But we had made the commitment and so we bought a house in downtown Sonora where Tim could have his own apartment under us.  Nice for all! He has become very independent and Mom could still be his mentor.

Well, guess what? After 5 years of this “perfect” situation as far as we can tell, Tim wants to move out into his own apartment: shock!  But then I think of my other grown children and they would want to do that too.  So we have given him our blessing to “look into it”.  But I can’t stop him as my goal has been "as independent as possible" and so we try knowing he could move back if it doesn’t work out. 

For those of you who have read more blogs, you know that Kevin has been part of our family as a son for 9 years now.  He has a matching studio apartment next to Tim’s and he too wants to move out. Another big shocker: they do not want to move in together! They each want their separate places.

Ok, I am sure many of you are having lots of questions flying through your mind as am I. How are they going to afford this? Will they be safe? Will they miss me?

So as I start this adventure of 2012 I wanted to start telling you about it and will keep you posted.