So I have been asked when and how do I start to get my child ready to shop on his own and cook food? Well, my answer would be when you start at an early age to show them how to wipe their face, clean up their messes and stuff like that. I remember wondering if Tim would ever eat without making a huge mess. Would he ever notice the food that fell on the table or floor or on himself? These are the starts of training for adulthood. We do it for all of our children but we must do it more specifically with our child with a disability. I remember putting peanut butter on his face near his lips to try and get him to "feel" his own face. We practiced looking in the mirror and wiping his own face and sending him back over and over again as he had missed the spot.
As I look back, all of that was part of his going grocery shopping on his own.
When to start? now... no matter how old your child. When they drop something quickly bring it to their attention and have them do something about it or at least look and be aware of what happened. Give affirmation when they finish a meal and their clothes are clean. Have them get down from the table and examine the floor with you and see how they did. Help them to make a sandwich and do it well with the mayo all the way to the edges, don't settle for just in the middle. And have you taught them to put everything away after they make the sandwich and wipe off the counter? Often child with disabilities set patterns as they do things and it is hard to change a pattern you let get started so make them do it right the first time. and...
As I write this, I am making myself tired! Yes, it does take extra time and effort on your part and no, you can't think the school is going to do it. So as my dear friend Debbie would say, "Just suck it up and do it!"
Until we teach them to do it right in the little things they will never be able to cook successfully and independently.
It is so easy to do it for them! it is easier on me! But I must continue to help Tim be ready to live without me with him.
Now, if you have read this all the way to the end you need to hear my confession.... I have not done it right all the time and I still get tired even with him being 29 years old. So I say he has graduated and I feel successful.... well, my 34 year old son is visiting and we ran out of lunch meat so he went down to Tim's apartment and asked to borrow some and Tim was glad to share with his big brother..... when Dave opened it there was mold..... :-( Just so you know I am still pressing on as well.
I am going to give a prize to Tim every time I visit and find no spoiled food in his frig. :-)
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